I have this thing I do when I am not happy with someone physically, mentally, emotionally or spiritually. I can understand blocking out trauma like SA, physical abuse, mental abuse, etc., but to block out the memories of a person for other reasons is kind of crazy. I have forgotten simple things about a person i was still talking to because it seemed like they did not care. I have blocked out sexcapades with an individual because he was lacking in the area I was using. I have blocked out memories of family members. The craziest part is I literally have no remorse about forgetting certain things. Then there is a time when you get a reminder of why you blocked out the memory and you are instantly pissed at yourself. All because they may make up for the memory you blocked out in plenty other ways.
You don't want to be an ass so you just thug it out for the moment. You even wonder if they know about it and how they would feel if you said something. Sometimes you honestly just want to blurt it out and don't give a damn how they feel because why? you start wondering " WTF was I thinking?", " Whose idea was it to create some shit like this?". Now you are asking all kinds of questions because now you are so upset with yourself for even opening that door back up. When you finally lighten up on yourself you laugh about the whole situation and this time you remember.
During the visit you want to ask questions like, what time you leaving? What time do you have to be at work? You try to throw every hint in the book that the day or night is over, but they are missing every single one. It's like their ears are velcroed down and they can only hear what they want. When you finally get some space, the relief is imminent and amazing, the shower is even better and that memory lasts forever.
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